Freak

Hey,
So Estelle's song, Freak, keeps playing in my head and it made me think about whether or not I'm a freak lol. I need to thank my favorite white girl for that song. That's why the song is her ringtone on my phone :D. I think about some of the things I've tried and enjoyed, and I can't help but have a BIG smile lol. Everyone has a freak in them; that's what I believe. The real issue is whether they're willing to explore it. I mean, I'm not saying you should do some homo sturvz oh, but find out what gets you off; it makes the experience more enjoyable. I'll even talk about some of the stuff I found out about myself.

First of all, I realized something about my nature when doing stuff: I'm not selfish. Almost every other guy I know expects to be pleasured and ignores the babe once he gets off. I'm the exact opposite. I wouldn't be happy until she's satisfied, and watching her get off gets me off. FREAK. I'd try anything the babe wants, as long as it'll make her happy. Why not? I mean, sex can be painful for women, hardly ever for men. If you can find a painless way to make someone happy, go for it.
*I also realized something about myself, and that was some humility (lol) in the sense that I never feel like I know it all when it comes to getting down. I have a lot of experience, but no two people are the same. I learn something from every person that I mess with.

Now, back to the main dish: ME ;D. On the realz, when I would talk to people and they mentioned weird things like biting, scratching and even beating, I would get scared and say that it shouldn't be wrestling. However, some curiosity caught me and I decided to find out for myself whether I'd like it or not. Well..... I LOVE being bitten. I LOVE it when a babe scratches my back and I bleed. I LOVE being restrained. It's painful and frustrating, but that handicap excites me more. I also know that ever guy (me included) loves a babe that moans although turning celestial and doing like you're possessed is going too far. It's also goes without question that we hate the silent type. Well, if your luck leads you to a silent type, do what I do: JIST!! Crack jokes!! Ask how she would want it. Anything to kill the boring silence that could even kill your arousal. A guy needs feedback that what he's doing is satisfactory.

Normal is boring; try something radical and see a difference in your love life. I love the risk you take when you get down in a public area. There's nothing like that rush of adrenalin to heighten your already aroused senses and take your sensitivity to an unbelievable level. I'm not talking about that high school shit like doing stuvz in a toilet during break; no, I'm talking about stuff like having sex in a class during class periods while there are lectures going on n neighboring classes. I'm talking about having sex in a parked car in broad daylight. Do you have the liver for that? Most people have humble beginnings (lol), some of us started from home, or primary school, or secondary school. You don't know till you try, and you can stop if you don't like it.

Let me go back 1 step for people who haven't had or don't have sex. There's still plenty for you guys lol. I realized something else: sometimes, foreplay is even crazier than the actual sex. I'll bet that when you're randy, you just rush your partner and do your thing. It's perfectly understandable; I mean, there are some days I skipped the foreplay and went straight to it. But there's something very crucial about foreplay to me; I see it as the process of heightening the anticipation and desire for sex. Usually, that's why people say,"Don't start what you can't finish". This is simply because it's frustrating to get so worked up without getting an actual release, but that's one of the ways to keep the flames of attraction very hot lol.

I realized that foreplay doesn't have to be restricted to some body parts. In fact, I believe in complete stimulation; stimulation of all your senses.
-Dim the lights, make things harder to see, but more exciting to watch. The frustration of not being able to see well does wonders to one's anticipation of getting you. Don't be ashamed of your body and turn the lights off; your partner won't be there with you if he/she didn't find your body attractive. For most people, being in less than clothes is enough to work them up lol. Pervs.
-Play beautiful music, or dirty songs as your orientation/situation may determine to sensitize the ears. It sets the mood. Sometimes, talking dirty (especially when you whisper to that person, when you both are with others in public) does a better job. Telling someone who wants you already, what you want to and intend to do to him/her can't really be disgusting; I mean, they already want to.
-Perfume, Incense, Scented Candles, they all give lovely smells and can be aphrodisiacs to increase stimulation . Sometimes, just having a shower with the right soap could do the trick.
-The taste of chocolate, whipped cream, wine, honey (my favorite) could have the blood rushing faster than you think. Besides, there's something quite erotic about feeding someone chocolate while doing stuvz; just don't make it messy. That would be bad table manners lol. For some romantics, just the taste of your partner's lips is sweet enough lol. Whatever works for you.
-Now, my favorite stimulus: touch. It involves direct contact, which is the fastest way to deliver a message. It can also be a discreet means of creating sexual tension. Our skin is full of nerves; work them to create sensations. Think about it. Being stroked on the inside of your thigh while you're trying to concentrate on studying for a test. Better yet, while your lecturer is teaching lol. Do some basic biology and find out where nerves are concentrated in the body (what people would call sensitive areas) and stimulate them. It's not that hard right? Be warned though,; some people are special and not so sensitive, so just ask if nothing seems to work lol.

For the people who just like the traditional methods of foreplay (i.e kissing, touching, groping, head, fingering), well try some more things. Try giving massages, try alternating cold and hot temperatures. This one is for the ladies' benefit, so don't be grossed out or mad at me: Guys, try putting an ice cube, ice cream or even a cold spoon on your babe's nipple. Weird, I know, but that's not all: when it's cold, lick it till it's warm again. From experience, every girl that allowed it to happen said the experience was mind-blowing. No jokes. I'm just saying, don't be so traditional and selfish. Take one for the team (and I'm talking to guys here; ladies are usually always taking it for the team lol). Because every guy likes getting head, I went to specialize in giving head (to babes oh!). Because every guy hates missionary, i went to research other styles that are comfortable and enjoyable for both (like the lotus seat). What......? Did y'all think I'd say I like missionary too? Dream on lol. Doggy for life mehn! That still doesn't mean that I won't do missionary oh; but the babe must reciprocate in her own way oh. Equality and fairness between members of the opposite sex lol.

So I just read what I've written so far and I can't help but shake my head. I'm a special child, but I pay attention to every detail. I'm a freak, and proud of it. I know that you don't have to have sex to get off, so broaden your horizons. I also know for a fact that the biggest freaks are the ones who try to appear morally upright and innocent. You also don't need to get drunk to try something; I mean, how will you remember it, or determine if you liked it or not? Ah well, it's your life, your choice. As for me, I really couldn't care about what you think about it; I'm happy, and every partner of mine has been happy (#fact). You can like to try my side of life every once in a while.

Now you understand part of the reason why I smile the way I smile sometimes......

To Be Led On

Hey,

So yesterday was my Dad's Birthday, along with Sam Okpo and Sanni Michael. I was out all day, and too lazy to type anything yesterday. I'm about to go out again, but I decided to drop something before I leave and continue when I get back.

So I've realized that I've been doing nothing but dropping lectures since I started blogging. I've decided to something different this time: share one of my experiences with you. This isn't something I would brag about; rather, it was a bad experience for me. I'll just get to it.

I met a girl who came to my school around the time I just got int a relationship (About 2 yrs ago). She was perfect to me, so hot that I wished I was still single. I instantly became her friend, since that was the safest thing I could do. To compound matters, she knew my then gf lol. As fate would have it, she decided to say yes to a jerk who was 2 years younger than her. All I could do was hope and pray that he would treat her right. He actually did a good job at the beginning, but his true nature eventually started displaying itself and the bad behavior started.

That was a bad time for my friend, as she endured a lot of insults and rudeness from her bf and I couldn't do anything about it but just comfort her. She kept taking the BS for many months until she eventually dumped him. Frankly, I was relieved and didn't hide it. Furthermore, I saw my opportunity, forgetting that you don't just get over your ex like that and the next person is just a rebound. I started giving serious attention and confided in one of my other female friends about my intentions. She begged me not to, since the bf was her friend as well. I told her to stay out of it, but she decided to run and tell the bf and make sure i was shut down. Some friend yeah?

I waited for a while, and still continued to pay attention to my friend oh. Eventually, we were talking daily, sitting together in class, just hanging out. Hell, everyone warned me that she had the habit of playing dumb and just enjoying attention. She then gets confused when the guy frees her in frustration, saying that she didn't know that he liked her. After several events like that, nobody wanted to hear her story, except me. I decided to give her the benefit of doubt, so I tried something new: I didn't allow her to have the opportunity to say she didn't know how I felt. I spilled my guts and told her to make her mind up, but not immediately, as there was another guy on her case that she seemed to like.

Even through the time I spent with her, I quietly reminded her that I didn't see her as a friend, and she shouldn't see me as her gay best friend since she was extremely comfortable around me. All my friends told her that I really liked her and she shouldn't waste my time; all she would do was smile and say she had heard them. Things got so intense that people thought we were in a relationship. Even when I went for my mum's FIFA competition in Abuja, i got her stuff and called her everyday. She was the first person I went to see as soon as I got back. I began to realize I was hooked, and being carried away.... I knew I had to get something concrete.

She was good at her game; she wouldn't really give me anything concrete, while I would be open about everything. I created a simple routine to make it easy for her to understand me. It was all a show of sincerity and commitment so she could trust me. She wanted to play games instead. She would talk about the other guy to me, knowing how I felt. Just when I get angry and ignore her, she would come and hustle my attention. Just when I think that it was pointless to continue, I would get this public display of affection that would confuse everyone, not just me. I mean, at a party in a lecturer's house, she walked straight up to me and ate out of my plate, even though she had hers. Everyone just kept quiet, and she just smiled and walked away. She would show me another side of herself that would just suck me in all over again. However, I began to realize that she was beginning to pay a price to keep me in this game; she had to open up to me. Her power over me began to drop.

I started taking control, the more she opened up to me. The turning point was when I was there for her when she was at her lowest and crying because of the other guy. She then asked me why I was so patient with her. I replied that I felt she is worth it, and that if she feels the same way I feel, she would eventually reciprocate and that's worth waiting for. She then replied, that it was a shame that I was leaving soon. I knew I was close to a capitulation, but I guessed she realized it as well because she closed up all over again. After a lot of thought, I just decided to talk to her and get an answer. She was still loading and asked if she was supposed to say something. LOL. When I said yes, she just kept quiet, then said,'I like you....As a friend'. I then asked her what took so long to just tell me instead of wasting my time and she had no answer. She told me though, that she was only interested in playing games, and I was too easy to figure out. I hadn't felt that insulted in a while lol. I then explained that she would never be able to handle the real me; that's why I pitied her and created something simple to understand because of what she went through with her ex. I then promised her something: I would NEVER come after her again, no matter what her answer would have been.

I guess my friend didn't take me seriously, because she kept waiting for me to continue as usual, like my world must revolve around her. She doesn't talk to me anymore, simply because I stopped calling, or visiting. I guess it never occurred to her that she should call. Such is life oh. Till now, I'm not sure if she really liked me at all, or she just saw me as a fool to offer free attention; I'll probably never know, but it's all in the past. I wish her well though, lol. No beef.

So the moral of my little story is: DON'T LEAD PEOPLE ON. You never really know what you've got till it's gone. I hope you enjoyed it.x

Adoration or Delusion?

So I didn't intend to write about this ever, but it kinda stuck in my subconscious even before my first post. Even when I was raging about how love has brought pain to my friends, I still couldn't understand the feeling of adoration they have (or had, as the case may be) for these guys. Despite, the intentional misdeeds and maltreatment, it occurred to me that these people would still forgive and accept them if they were begged or serenaded long /well enough. Their only escape was to run, block all form of contact, maintain a lot of distance and find a rebound ASAP. For the life of me, I do not understand why you would still accept or bear the source of your pain. Fine, maybe that person was the source of your happiness, but if the pain and sorrow are a constant routine, then let go. The world won't end, and you'll be able to find something better.

I've spoken to many people in this situation, and when I ask why they don't do anything about their maltreatment, they all fall silent. I begin to wonder if they even know why they bear the bullshit, because I refuse to call such a thing love. I've noticed another thing about people in such situations; they convince themselves that things or that person will change. Depending on how one sees it, such a mentality is either hope or delusion. Take for example,  you know your gf is cheating on you. You nab her and she begs your forgiveness. That's all well and good, but you know there's no guarantee it won't happen again. So what next? You hope it doesn't? When or where do you draw the line to your limit of taking BS in the name of "Love"? I really don't know.....

It's synonymous with EVERY single person I know that they only ended their relationships because they were forced to, not because they wanted to. They were all willing to bear it all, no matter what form of complaint they made; to me, such noise is similar to the roar of a fangless, pawless lion. I asked what was so special about the loved ones, and there was nothing. Nothing! Imagine? Basically, it was simply the love that kept them there, oh yeah, and the hope that those people will change. Wake the fuck up!!

If you know your worth and you aren't getting it in return, BOUNCE! If you put your significant other first, and it isn't reciprocated, then guess what? You aren't significant to the other person. If being trampled on physically, mentally or emotionally, pick yourself up. If you're being taken for granted, don't take yourself and your happiness for granted, not for anybody. I've said it before and I'll say it again: Love is NEVER enough; If it were, we wouldn't have so many frequent break-ups or divorces. I'll discuss this further in another blog, trust me. I'm also speaking from experience; I've been maltreated, hurt, betrayed, name it. I had to realize that no one is worth the sacrifice if that person can't even recognize it, talk more of acknowledging it, or better yet, showing gratitude for it.

I saw this statement in a manga,'Admiration is the emotion furthest from comprehension'. If love robs you of all reason or logic, then it's pure, unadulterated Obsession to me. Think about it, if you can manage to separate your thoughts from your "love" lol.

Cheers

Denial

Hey

So I'm here, ready to talk about something new despite my fatigue. Insomnia is a curse, but when you're constantly sneezing on top...... Do the math. So, I'll just talk about something else that intrigues and bothers me: Denial.

I view it in two ways:
1. Lying to others
2. Lying to yourself

Most people I know, deny allegations to save face. Nobody wants to look bad or stupid,  especially in the public view. This is perfectly understandable, but isn't right. Usually, denying something or even someone comes with a heavy price. One will have to shift blame to another person for the issue and make that person a scapegoat. I've seen people discard their most loyal friends in such a situation. If you aren't trustworthy, you will end up alone and no man is an island. We all need help and support from people we can trust.

However, it is the second kind that baffles me to no end. Self-denial is a very pitiful thing, as that person is probably sick and doesn't know it. Such people usually believe they are smarter than everyone else, therefore, they can do anything and get away with it. They have high opinions about themselves and refuse to hear anything otherwise. They create public images, as part of their obsessive need to control everyone and everything every time. I think that's borderline psychotic.

If you know you are two different personalities in public and private, you might like to see a psychiatrist about a possible case of Multiple Personality Disorder lol. Isn't it taxing to keep up such appearances? Mehn if people already have an impression of you, just deal with it; it doesn't matter. First impressions are almost usually wrong. They aren't even worth the fuss; If they were worth it, they would want to get to know you for you. You can even use such impressions to your advantage, I mean, at least you're being talked about, ergo, you're relevant. Remember Oscar Wilde: "The only thing worse than being talked about is NOT being talked about". Suck it up; other people are hustling for attention, whether it's fame or infamy. You know yourself, don't let anybody else determine who you are.


That's some food for thought. Till next time.....

The Genesis

The Past 24hrs caused the creation of my blog; this is an outlet for me to vent.

This blog only came about because of love. This beautiful, yet terrible emotion…. Love. I feel so frustrated with it; I’m tired of it and the irony is that I’m not the one who’s in love. My friends are. The sad part is that they’re suffering for it. In the space of 24hrs, two girls ended serious relationships against their will. In the space of four months, only one of my friends started a relationship, while the rest ended theirs. The main cause of their sorrow was the guy; ALWAYS the guy. Normally, I would have been the first to defend them, being a guy but they were absolutely right. Every single guy didn’t show attention or concern, used them or lied to them. Some cheated with their ex-girlfriends, others, strangers. Some just used them for money or sex. Bottom line: they maltreated these women shamelessly.

From a guy’s point of view, one would congratulate them for being a player, or a ‘Bad Guy” (lol) but, they all forget that these women are human beings too with feelings, intelligence, pride and dignity. They forget that these women have greater power, if it comes to hurting them; they chose instead to love them and put them first. I believe in God and his fairness, and I believe in Karma and the absolute nature of it. They also forget that they’re most likely not the first to have these girls and they aren’t going to be the last to be with them; why make it hard for everyone else after them?

I’ll be honest, women are special. They don’t know what they want sometimes, bitch, moan, complain about any and everything; they also cook for us, clean after us, clothe us and they’re the ones who gave birth to us. They were our mothers, and will be our wives. Nothing or no one is perfect, starting with yourself, so you should be grateful that someone would love you for yourself, despite your many defects. I’ll say it again, women ARE special, and no man will ever understand a woman (unless he’s gay, and such doesn’t apply here), but I believe they appreciate our patient efforts to understand them. I think that makes all the difference in the world to them.

I won’t be a hypocrite here; I mean, I’m a World-Class Ashewo. However, I can proudly say that I’ve NEVER intentionally broken a heart and I’ve always apologized for it. Apart from one incident, every time I had my own heart broken was my fault and I learnt from my lesson. You know, a little honesty could go a long way. I mean, when I’m after a girl, I make my intentions clear and that removes any possibility of deception. The woman will know what she’s getting into, and she’ll have an opportunity to back down. It’s not by force to sleep with a girl, especially if you know that’s all you want. We ALL know that lust is fun, but ONLY if it’s both ways. Saying anything to get into a lady’s pants is bad enough; using love to get sex is the worst thing to do. It traumatizes a person, makes them feel worthless; it almost guarantees hatred not only for such a person, but all men in general. Look, all I’m just saying is be honest in your intentions (whatever they are) and if you get lucky, show some gratitude and treat them well, with the utmost respect and care. That isn’t too much to ask is it?

Believe me when I tell you that you’re lucky to be loved by these girls, because I know I’d do a better job than you.